My sweet babies,
Right now you come to me for any problem you encounter.
Knowing all that it will take is one quick trip to mom and any issue you’ve encountered
will be solved. Ill kiss your scraped knee, glue the pieces, wipe up the spills,
right the wrongs… and as much as I wish I could tell you life will always be
that simple, the hard truth is, its not.
There will come a day my babies, that you will find yourself
standing in front of a mountain, and the only person who can move it, will be
you. You may have friends to lean on, and family to catch you when you fall,
but the mountain itself will be yours alone. And merely looking at it will be daunting
to say the least.
When this happens my baby, I need you to promise me
something.
Promise me you will be brave, no matter how treacherous the
climb. These mountains, I am sorry to say, will feel impossible at times, you
will stand there looking at what’s in front of you and every voice in your head
will tell you there is no possible way that just one human could possibly
survive the things you must face…. Your mind will spin with 1000 reasons you
will assuredly fail, and every bone in your body will want to turn and run. Don’t
do that my angel, if your heart is telling you that mountain must be moved then
you stay, you stay and you fight like you’ve never fought before. You fight
even when your knuckles are bruised and bleeding, you fight when your muscles
are weak and ache for rest, you fight no matter how badly you want to give up
because settling for less than you deserve will hurt so, so much deeper, than
any damage this fight could ever cause to you.
My darling children, the thing I hold highest in my
parenting of you is ensuring I raise you to be people who believe in yourself,
who know that your voice matters, and who won’t back down from what you believe in. But I know, that no matter how strong your mind is, there will be
times that it betrays you, it will tell you that you are not good enough, that
this fight you are fighting isn’t worth it. That your efforts are too little,
even when you’re giving it your all. It’ll tell you the thing you are fighting
for was never meant for you. It’ll list all the reasons you would never been
good enough for that thing you are fighting for. It’ll be so convincing you will
start to believe it… I am begging you my babies, don’t listen to that voice. That
voice, filled with doubt, doesn’t know what you are capable of.
I know it feels like your life is dependent upon your ability
to build this house of cards in the middle of a hurricane. I know the walls
just won’t stop caving in around you. I know, that by all logical reasoning,
that mountain cannot be moved. I know that you are giving every last bit of yourself,
and still feel as though you are still falling short in every way. I know how
alone you feel; I know how scared you are, I know it feels like you have
nothing left to give and everything left to do. And I know, that everything in
your soul wants to crawl into bed and forget the whole thing. Its ok to feel that
baby, its ok to break, its ok to scream, its ok curl up on the bathroom floor
and cry until your eyes run out of tears…its ok to lose your mind right now, in
fact, I think you are supposed to. So call your friends and say you quit, call
your mom and beg to be little again, talk to Jesus until you’re weak in the
knees. But when you are done, you HAVE to pick yourself back up, and listen to
that little voice coming from your heart that whispers “let’s try just one more
time”. My angel, Never. Stop. Trying. Again.
You were not made to be defeated by this life. You
are capable of anything you set your mind to, and there is nothing in this
world that would leave you exempt from the same right to happiness that I know
you desire for the rest of this world. I know that mountain seems impossible.
But I also know that your heart is unstoppable.
So pick yourself back up my love, try, just one more time,
and don’t stop until you’ve made it to the other side. You’ve got this my love.
That tiny voice inside your heart is so much stronger than it seems. Listen to
it. Let it guide you. Fight for it, against all logic, and never, ever, give
up.
You can do this baby.
Find your strength, embrace the storm.
Don’t let it take you down, don’t let the hurt change who
you are, don’t throw those stones in the way of others as you clear your path. Instead
take those stones you are moving and turn them into seeds that will grow into
something beautiful.
Go into the storm with love, hold onto your light with
everything you have. Remain kind, remain loving, but don’t you dare back down.
Someday you will look back at this time and see how beautiful
your broken was. You will see strength where you now see weakness. You will see
courage, where you now see giving up. You will see how hard you are trying. How
much you are giving, to everything you are doing. You’ll see yourself in the way
that everyone who loves you already does.
So set your eyes on your goal, and believe with everything
you have that it is yours for the taking.
Trust in yourself my child.
Believe in yourself
Never stop fighting for yourself.
That mountain will move, You will reach the other side.
You will be Ok my love.
I promise.
I love you my babies,
I am on your side, I am with you every step of the way, to
catch you, to hear you, to push you back out there to make you keep going.
Chase your dreams my love.
You’ve got this
Xoxo -Momma
